Glume de-ale programatorilor


Two strings walk into a bar. The first one says:
Hello, I’d like some Vodka andytewsr@)W$(#*$&!^Y@)^&30@#!
„You’ll have to excuse my friend,” the second one says, „he’s not null-terminated.”

––––––

As soon as she walked through my door I knew her type: she was an argument waiting to happen. I wondered if the argument was required… or merely optional? Guess I’d know the parameters soon enough.

„I’m Star At Data”, she offered.
She made it sound like a pass. But was the pass by name? Or by position?
„I think someone’s trying to execute me. Some caller.”
„Okay, I’ll see what I can find out. Meanwhile, we’re gonna have to limit the scope of your accessibility.”
„I’d prefer not to be bound like that,” she replied.
„I see you know my methods,” I shot back.
She just stared at me, like I was a block. Suddenly I wasn’t surprised someone wanted to dispatch her.
„I’ll return later,” she purred. „Meanwhile, I’m counting on you to give me some closure”.
It was gonna be another routine investigation.
– Dashiell Hammett, „The Maltese Camel”

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De ce prefer Java sau .NET

De ce prefer Java sau .NET

Mititele


Bancuri de programatori


Care este diferenta dintre un programator amator si unul profesionist? Cel amator crede ca un kilobyte are 1000 de bytes, iar cel profesionist crede ca un kilometru are 1024 de metri.

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Culmea calculatoarelor? Sa gonesti musca de pe ecran cu cursoru de la mouse.

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De cati programatori este nevoie pentru infiletarea unui bec? De nici unul…e problema de „hard

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De ce numai 10% din creierul uman contine cod executabil? S-a descoperit ca restul sunt comentarii

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Ziua programatorilor


Multumesc tuturor pentru urari 🙂

Motivul pentru care 13 Septembrie (respectiv 12 Septembrie in anii bisecti) este ziua programatorilor este acela ca este a 256-a zi din an. 256 este puterea a 8-a a lui 2.

De asemenea este numarul de valori pe care il poate lua un octet (un byte), un element de baza in lucrul nostru.

LA MULTI ANI TUTUROR PROGRAMATORILOR! 🙂

Citate de programatori – partea IV


„Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.” – John F. Woods

 

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
Douglas Adams

 

Debugging is twice as hard as writing the program, so if you write the program as cleverly as you can, by definition, you won’t be clever enough to debug it.

 

 

PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals.
Jon Ribbens

 

[Sonium] someone speak python here?
[lucky] HHHHHSSSSSHSSS
[lucky] SSSSS
[Sonium] the programming language

 

„I don’t care if it works on your machine! We are not shipping your machine!”

It’s the blog tagline of one Ovidiu Platon, Romanian Microsoft Student Partner [link http://studentclub.ro/ovidiupl/default.aspx ] Unfortunately it disagrees with the „Works on my machine” Certification. Damn shame!

 

„If the user can’t find it, the function’s not there”

„It’s my blog tagline 🙂 ” [link http://www.tudorvlad.ro ] I’ll probably change it and keep it for when I grow up.

 

„In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they aren’t even close”
It can be applied to many fields, but goes great with programming.

Citate de programatori – partea III


„Mostly, when you see programmers, they aren’t doing anything. One of the attractive things about programmers is that you cannot tell whether or not they are working simply by looking at them. Very often they’re sitting there seemingly drinking coffee and gossiping, or just staring into space. What the programmer is trying to do is get a handle on all the individual and unrelated ideas that are scampering around in his head.”
Charles M Strauss

 

There are 10 kinds of people in the world – those who understand binary and those who don’t.

 

Pasting code from the internet into production code is like chewing gum found in the street.

 

GOTO is a four letter word.
Edsger W. Dijkstra

 

 

„Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.”
Rich Cook

Citate de programatori – partea II


Your mom is so fat she sat on a binary tree and turned it into a linked list in constant time!

 

Saying Java is good because it works on all OSes is like saying anal sex is good because it works on all genders.

 

„If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the next woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.” – Unknown.

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